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Blogspam intro: "Hey, There, I found your blog while surfing the internet." - Um, isn't that how most people find blogs?
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Spam subject: "my watch arrived today" - and yet the sender is "Luxury Pens." What does a pen need with a watch?
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Spam subject: "Top tips on staying relevant in your job" from "Free Viagra & Cialis" - Sorry, I don't work in that field.
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Spam subject: "Its amaaazing" - This isn't more warp-speed tooth-whitening again, is it?
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Spam subject: "Pilates with a punch" - No, those are pirates. (Don't feel bad. They had the same problem in Penzance: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Pirates_of_Penzance )
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Spam subject: "I'm in traffic jam" - and not helping matters by sending email while driving.
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Spam subjects: "Horrible situation here!" and "Control time." Or at least stop it. With a freeze ray.
Spam subject: "She will be amazed by your new power" - But that's still not a good reason to hang around radioactive spiders, gamma bomb test sites, or stand by the window of the chem lab during a lightning storm.
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Spam subject: "Tired of being a man with delicate sphere problems? You can solve it all naturally and easily!"
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Spam subject: "Invisible appz parking" - The only problem is, you can never tell whether a space is open or not.
Spam subject: "A mania is about to begin." - Always good to have advance warning on that.
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@lolspam shout out to my bipolar buddies :)
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I can't tell if this spam subject is a typo or a euphemism: "Put your cork in every girl that your dream of!"
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Disturbing spam subject: "Be her seduction-man, Need real anti-fungal?" - Seriously, it was just one spam. #WTF
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Spam subject: "Forget expensive doctor's visits" - It's OK. You'll remember when you get the bill for the cancellation fee.
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Those "You've been scammed! Give us all your financial info and we'll fix it!" scams must be thinking, well, the mark fell for it once...
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Spam subjects at cross purposes: "Let your volcano erupt!" and "Prevent premature eruptions!"
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Spam subject: "Fantastic shag pics" - Why would I want to look at carpets from the 1970s?
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Spam subject: "Your dream travel could be within reach" - If it's that close, it isn't really travel, is it?
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Spam subject: "Your tool might be as big as a tower in Seattle to satisfy any woman you want." That sounds really awkward, actually.
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Spam subject: "Every extra inch gives her extra chance for reaching final destination." Saw those movies. Don't think she wants to go there.
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Spam subject: "clean up your home with a new floor." - Don't you need to clean up the home first, so you can put in the new floor?
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Spam subject: "Always wanted a Beautiful Deck?" Home improvement or misspelling? YOU DECIDE!
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Spam subjects: "Feel 10 years younger in bed today" & "Only 2 days left to pick up your books!" - I don't want to wake up in high school again
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Spam subject: "Did this photo go too far?" - Yeah, it was only supposed to go across town and it ended up on the other side of the planet.
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Spam subject: "The key to unlocking your hidden potential" - Huh. It was under the doormat all along.
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Spam subject: "This rock rules!" I must tell my friends. They don't have a rock that rules this much.
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Spam subject: "My filthy secret revealed tonight" - What, you haven't showered in a week?
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Related spam subjects? "I broke brakes!" and "Cars smashed fantastically" Actually the second one is kind of intriguing.
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Spam subject: "Upsize your sausage into a bratwurst" - Yeah, they're definitely talking about BBQ.
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Spam subject: "Scam Alert: You Have Been Scammed !!" - Not surprisingly, the message itself was a scam.
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Spam subject: "For your carnal productivity" - I know it's a V-spam, but it sounds like something for a butcher shop.
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Spam subjects: "Meet her carnal needs" & "Use it for carnal carnivals." Why do I think they're not talking about barbecues?
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Spam subject: "Your kid has never played minecraft on a screen this big" - Please tell me this is the place Frank bought his 2000" TV from!
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Spam subject: "Pay shipping for your erotic nights" - How exactly do you ship a night, anyway?